JULIA
(my girlfriend, duh)
Yeah, wasn't it an accident or something?
ME
No. She had a heart attack because she didn't have enough potassium, which was in turn because of bulimia. So bulimia made her like this.
JULIA
And now they've taken out her feeding tube!
ME
It is what she wanted! We've solved the mystery.
You'll make an excellent juror.
Humor has its limits--far out as they may be.
Believe me, when I reach the limit, you'll know it.
A colleague of mine pointed out that anybody who'd result to self-purging in order to look good would hardly want to live on like this. Make out your living wills, even those of you in your 20s.
Among the messages my friends and I have received in the newsroom this week from the lunatic fringe:
- That Terri was "eating pudding and talking to everyone in her room last night."
- That the government needs her to die and be cremated so they can get rid of "the evidence."
I love my job.
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