Who says movies don't inspire crime?

It turns out Joe Lieberman was right all along: entertainment is evil.

We start in Lakewood, Washington, where the Captain Jack Sparrow Bandit has turned himself in to police...excuse me, but I think I just ended a clause with a preposition there, so I'm going to rephrase that.

In Lakewood, Washington we start, where in the Captain Jack Sparrow Bandit has turned himself...to police. Yes, that's better.

Apparently Captain Jack turned himself in after a night of local news coverage and rising YouTube popularity. He really banged up his leg, and he claims he didn't know what was going on because he was drunk. Uh, yeah. (That last sentence was ambiguous, but understand that I was trying to convey skepticism. Geez, I'm really self-conscious today.)

In other news, Jose Espinosa (Tim Robbins) was captured by police this week, while his fellow prison-breaker Otis Blunt (Morgan Freeman) is still on the loose. (They hid their escape routes behind pictures of women in bikinis, you see. Also, they learned a lot about themselves.)

And in Furdell.com news, we will not be remodeling this site into a Seattle chicken wing review blog, as this has already been done. Sorry, wing enthusiasts.